Recovery

About my choice to freely speak on Recovery

You will never know on my social media platforms what fellowship(s) I enter to save me from myself (unless I see you there) I hope you can respect that as much as I respect it for you. But - you will know that I am a person in long term recovery who is recovering from abuse of prescription medication, alcohol, illegal drugs and even cigarettes. I'm recovering from obsession, chronic pain, disordered eating, abuse, anxiety and loss of many people I love who died before me, Including my own self. You will also know that I honour and celebrate (with deep emotion) my last date I stopped acting out in all of the above and chose to live like the woman who I deserve to be. I do not do any of the above alone. I surround myself with like minded people and try to help others (who want help) and who suffer by only sharing what I know has worked for me. I also support all forms; fellowships, treatment centres, recovery locations and facilities that are recovery based. Never do I bash something that saved even one life or gave one life back to loved ones.
Do I have a God? I am spiritual - I have a power greater than me that 'lifted me of the floor' keeps my self will humble, and that's just as sacred, ever evolving, and less destructive then when I'm left to my own thinking and devises. I will not bash you or your spiritual (or lack of) outlets. I am always intrigued as I have personally witnessed life after death. I will on my social media platforms or publicly speak, honour, be open, and not judge and share anything that can give hope as long as there is no harm or hurt towards others. 
Why not speak about long term recovery? Because I have lived my whole life in guilt, shame, pain and confusion. I choose today to not be that person and will do things differently then I did before. Today I honour my successes but also honour my 'failures' in knowing I am not perfect; Nor do I ever want to be perfect by staying 'on the beam' to the best of my abilities.
I will respect those who wish to remain anonymous; please respect my decision to have a voice with others like me who are proud (not ego driven) to be alive and feeling IT all - TRULY ALIVE - What a gift. - Heidi